It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
