party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
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