what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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