oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize