I got chris browned last night
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
