if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
