I'm gonna have a badass scar
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Randomize
