I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
