I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
