we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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