So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I think your dad took our porno
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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