It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
