Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
you told grandpa to call you daddy
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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