i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
