Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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