just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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