I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
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