Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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