i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
