My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
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