Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
Can I color on your dick again?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
