Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Randomize
