mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize
