Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You know the @ sign on twitter? i wish there was one of those in real life so that the smokin' hot guy at the bar would know the slutty unbuttoning of my shirt was directed @ him, not @ his friend who looks like Mickey Rourke post-face melting
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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