you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
