What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
