p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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