Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
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