It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
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