I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
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