Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize