it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
Randomize
