After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
