We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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