Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
