sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
