no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
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