One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
