Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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