you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
