Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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