Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
