She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
