I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
