Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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