just took a shot of grandma at the fucking bowling alley... this is going to be interesting
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
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