only if we run a train.
done.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
