OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Randomize
