i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
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