we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Randomize
