Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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